Just the Sister
by TNM-Writer
Summary: I am an accident. The result of a one night stand between my mother and a stranger. But that doesn't mean I don't love my sister, or my Mom. So I'm doing the best I can to help Bella after Edward leaves her. Even if that means having nothing of my own in return. Set in NM! AU, slightly. T for safety. very sad. ON HOLD!
1. Critical Decision

**Just the Sister**

**Summary: **I am an accident. The result of a one night stand between my mother and a stranger. But that doesn't mean I don't love my sister, or my Mom. So I'm doing the best I can to help Bella after Edward leaves her. Even if that means having nothing of my own in return. Set in NM!

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**Chapter One – A Critical Decision**

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The December air was bitingly cold, but I ignored it in favor of continuing my walk. I needed to get away from the house, which was full of depressing _everything_ since before October. Bella wouldn't notice, she just sat in her room, staring out the window, and Charlie was too preoccupied with Bella to notice my absenses from the house. The chilling air didn't damper the amazingness of the forest, though. It was nearly January now, and the snow had melted, leaving frost and cold winds.

The crisp crunch of the grass under my feet on the well worn path made me smile. I took a long breathe, enjoying the freshness of the air. Different from anything else I could ever find. This was one of the reasons I was happy coming to live with Charlie, being the third wheel of the family again.

Now, one may ask why I would be the third wheel. After all, I'm family, aren't I? No. I'm not related to Charlie in the least bit, I'm only Bella's half sister. My mother, Renee, had a one night stand while drunk on the anniversary of her and Charlie's divorce. She doesn't even remember having sex with the unknown man, but I am the result of her carelessness. Renee, as she has told me, couldn't bare to give me up, and kept me instead of sending me to an orphanage or something like that.

But, despite all Renee's efforts, I was overlooked by most things. But I love her for the fact that she tries so hard for me. Bella? Oh, she overlooks me a lot, too, but never as much as she has since she met that Edward Cullen. And now that he dumped her and left with his family, she never noticed anything, let alone me. Charlie made some effort with me, and we spent some weekends watching football games with his friend Billy. That nearly made him like a father to me.

But nothing, _nothing_, could compare to the natural forests. I loved them the most. A bird chirped nearby, and I pulled my large, oversized brown coat tighter around me. It was a gift from Charlie, saying I'd grow into it, and the sleeves hung five inches after my fingers. I was a small person, I knew that, and the thought that Charlie thought enough to give me something like this made me smile.

I stared up at the tree tops for a moment, stopping and just staring. The clouds were thick, blocking most of the sunlight that would have warmed me – and hurt my eyes, which were sensitive to light – but the scene was very pretty. A small smile curled onto my lips, and I looked back at the path, continuing. Soon enough, I found the place where Bella had described that the Edward guy had broken up with her.

Edward… He was an enigma to me. Too pale, too quick, golden eyes, too pretty. Handsome, smart, caring, loving. Too perfect. He was like a Disney Prince come to life, and Bella was the Cinderella. I had always thought that he and his family were a little different from the norm, from the rare times I saw them together, since I was only in seventh grade. They were all supposedly foster children, yet had a likeness that made them look related.

And even now, I associated them with the idea of Vampires. They fit the agenda, but they went out during the day, and Vampires had red eyes. This made me come to think that some of the myths were wrong, since I remember hearing Bella and Edward talk without them noticing me. I guess I was so overlooked that even a Vampire didn't notice me.

It was better without them here, but also not as good. Bella was dying inside, Charlie was becoming too stressed, but there wasn't the threat of one of them breaking their 'animal eating' diet accidently and killing someone. That was always a plus.

I could feel a migrane coming on from thinking about this so much, and sighed. Or, more like, huffed. Too much thinking about the Cullens made my head hurt, but I couldn't help it when they were the cause of almost everything going on in Bella's life.

"Kid, what are you doing out here?" A gruff voice asked, and I spun around.

Standing behind me was a man who looked to be over six feet tall, with copper tanned skin, rounded muscles, short black hair and dark brown eyes. He wore no shirt or shoes, only jean shorts, and there was an intricate tattoo on his right bicep.

All in all, he looked very intimidating, but I relaxed a little after recognizing him from Billy's descriptions. This was Sam Uley, I believed, the guy who Billy praises, but most people think he's a gang leader. I was told he was nineteen. I trust Billy, so I'd trust Sam. For now, at least.

"Uh, taking a walk." I answered, and my eyes narrowed. "I take it you are, too. But you'll catch your death with no shirt on, idiot."

His lips twitched, and I realized he found me amusing. "I'll be fine. Its not safe out here for elementary students-"

"I'm thirteen, idiot." I said in monotone, a slight glare now directed at him. "And its safer than it was before."

He raised an eyebrow. "And how would you know that?"

I shrugged. "Whatever. I'll go. Just get a shirt on. Idiot."

I walked past him, and continued down the path, slightly peeved my walk had been interrupted. I heard Sam call back at me, though.

"Whats your name?" He asked, and I stopped, turning to look at him.

"Evangeline Higginbotham." I then continued walking, but if I glanced back, I would have seen that Sam was gone. And so was my good mood.

/

The wheather is still cold, even a little colder today, creating a bit more frost. Its been a day since I first saw Sam Uley, and I couldn't help but wonder why he had only shorts on. The thoughts nagged at me continuesly until I put my headphones on and blasted the music. If it was loud enough, I wouldn't be able to think of anything else but the music.

So this was how I found myself walking along the side of the road to the La Push reservation – more detailed, the beach – for some peace and quiet. I had on my jacket, jeans, hiking boots, a white shirt under a thick dark blue sweater, my mid-back length dark brown hair held in a bun under a black beanie, head phones over it, music loud enough that if someone came close enough, they would be able to hear it, too.

I would have asked for a ride, but Charlie was working, and Bella hadn't responded to anything I said. I don't think she even knew I had entered her room, which made me a little sad.

Humming along to the bamboo flute-piano duet, Trail of Angels, I smiled slightly when the beach parking lot came into view. It was too cold to swim, but I did love looking out at the water. I was a little tired today, too, so maybe I could catch up on some sleep.

A muffled shout came from my left, and I glanced over to see Jacob Black, one of the people that, along with Billy, didn't overlook me, was driving his Rabbit into the lot. He'd rolled down his window, and was shouting at me. With a sigh – huff – I paused my I-Pod, and uncovered one ear.

"Hey, Jake." I greeted, walking up to the car as he got out. "How a-"

"Moron!" He said with a frown. "Its, what, seven below, and your _walking_? Do you have a death wish or something? Why didn't you get a ride?"

I shrugged. "Charlie's at work. Bella…" That was all that was needed to say about her at the moment. "Anyways, what are you doing out here?" I glanced at the two other boys in the car, one with equally long hair like Jacob.

"Quil, Embry and I wanted to hang at the beach." Jacob said, and turned to the guys. "Hey, guys, introduce yourselves to Bella's sister!"

Bella's sister. Was that all I would ever be? I knew Jacob didn't mean it, it was the only way that people really gave me a second glance. But it still sent a pang in my heart, but I wouldn't let it get to me. I loved my sister, no matter what, so I wouldn't get jelous of her. I just had to make a name for myself for a change.

"I didn't know Bella had a sister." The guy with the long hair said, coming up, and holding out his hand. "Embry Call."

"We're half sisters through our Mom." I told them. "Evangeline Higginbotham, but you can call me Evan."

He gave me an impish, hesitant grin and I realized he must be painfully shy. "Nice to meet you. This knuckle head here is Quil Ateara the Fifth."

I glanced at the shorter haired guy, who was smiling sheepishly. "Fifth? That's gotta be confusing."

He nodded. "Yeah, it is sometimes. But they call my Grandpa 'Old Quil'." He didn't mention his father, so I didn't bring it up.

"Well, I guess that's that, then." Jacob said. "Guys, you mind if Evan tags along?"

They shrugged, and Quil said nonchalantly. "As long as she doesn't mind a little roughhousing."

I smiled slightly. This was just what I needed to get my mind off Bella.

"Oh, she'll be fine." Jacob said. "She's just a tiny Chihuahua. Cant do no harm."

I glared up at him, and kicked his ankle hard enough for him to stumble. "Wanna repeat that, Jakey-boy?"

The other two laughed with loud guaffs, as Jacob huffed a breath out, and glared. "Your ganna get it, Evie-girl."

I squeaked as he grabbed me by my waist and through me over his shoulder, and started spinning. I was laughing the whole time, even when my head phones slid down to rest uncomfortably on my neck oddly.

"Okay, okay, I give! I'm a Chihuahua! I'm a Chihuahua!" I shouted, and Jacob was laughing as he sat me down, and I tried to hold the giggles in. "Thanks a lot, Jake. I have no appetite now, or else I'll blow."

He smirked. "Serves you."

This was how it should be with Bella. She should be the one to make me laugh like this, to tease me kindly, to laugh with me. Back in Phoenix, she would have, too. But not here in Forks, where her _amazing_ Edward had dated and dumped her. I felt my mood lowering slightly when I realized something; I resented Edward and Bella. That…That wasn't good. I loved my sister, and if Edward made her happy, I was fine with him. And I had a feeling that he was coming back, so it didn't matter that he'd left her, because he was coming back, which meant he hadn't meant it at all.

I squashed the resentment down, and followed the three guys to the beach. This was how it was supposed to be. I liked the way Jacob and his friends made me feel like I wasn't unnoticed, and I really thought they were nice. Maybe having friends would do me some good.

/

Its January now. Bella was forced to go out on a Girls' Night Out with me, by the word of Charlie. If she didn't, he was going to send her back to Renee's or get her an appointment with a shrink. I didn't want my sister to leave, and Bella obviously didn't want to go, so we ended up heading out that night to Port Angles.

"So…" I said awkwardly. "What do you want to see?"

Bella shrugged, not even looking at the movie list above the ticket lady. We were fourth in line. I would have picked the zombie one, but it was obviously a romance, and Bella didn't need that. So, looking around, I spotted one that was apparently rated R for gore. I usually wouldn't see these kinds of things, they scared me shitless and I ended up shaking afterwards, but it was just the kind of thing that Bella wanted to see. I could sacrifice my comfort for Bella, it was the least I could do as her sister.

"We'll see _Mortal Days_." I told her. "But its rated R, so you'll need your ID out, okay?"

Bella nodded absently. "Does it look good?"

"Yeah." I lied, mentally wincing at the poster for it. "Its supposed to be an action movie, something about Werewolves."

She nodded, looking a little better. "Okay."

I smiled slightly. I didn't need to be visible. Being invisible was perfectly fine, as long as I was able to help Bella. It was worth the fear this movie was going to bring me, or the chance of nightmares. So, we got our tickets – along with some questioning looks directed at us by the ticket-lady – and went inside. We got a large popcorn and drinks, along with my own little box of candy.

When we entered the theater and sat down, I looked around, and saw that most everyone else was older than us. And then the movie started.

Bella was enjoying, relaxing as the horror went on. She didn't even flinch at anything. I held in whimpers, forcing myself not to close my eyes, for Bella. My knees were shaking, and I had a death grip on my sleeves, jaw clenched. With every scream from the movie, the shaking increased. By the end of the movie, I was nearly in shock, while Bella actually was smiling. I felt like I wanted to cry, but at her smile, I forced myself not to think about it.

We had dinner, and then a little escapade with some thugs on the side of the street. It turned out, thrill was all Bella needed to become herself again. I guess it was expected; dating a Vampire must have been thrilling, so for what went on now, it was no surprise she acted as if nothing surprised her anymore.

If thrill was what Bella needed, I would help her get it.

That night, Charlie looked happier than he had in months when Bella actually laughed at a joke he said. That night, I didn't sleep a wink, shivering in my bed, crying into the pillow silently. It was okay. Bella was okay, and that meant everything. It didn't matter, as long as my sister was okay.

**(*)**

**Chapter End**

**(*)**

** Oh god, this was hard to write. I'm so used to writing defiant, outspoken characters, that to write such a submissive one nearly killed me. I nearly made Evangeline that kind of character when I introduced Sam. That was actually a spur of the moment decision, trying to introduce her to the Pack. **

** I'm trying to make Evangeline as realistic as possible. She wants her sister to be okay, even if it hurts herself to do so. But she also wants Bella to be a little like Jacob, who's like this giant warm sunny big brother. She wants to be noticed, but at the same time, is giving up that want for her sister. **

** Basically, she's contradicting herself while helping Bella. She resents Edward and Bella, but loves them too much to do anything about it. This is really angsty, and I wanted to make it romance, to just try, but I cant do it. But I will be making the Pack – no spoilers, TNMW, no spoliers…**

** But…Damn, this was hard to write. **


	2. Thrill Seeker

**Just the Sister**

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**Chapter Two – Thrill Seeker**

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Bella and I picked up some bikes the next day on the Marks' lawn. There had been two out there, and Bella had wasted no time in buying them, saying she had a friend who fixed cars. I knew instantly that she was talking about Jacob, and suddenly, I felt anger and resentment rising in me again. Jacob… He was _my _sun, the personal being that lifted my spirits on complete accident just through being him. My Sun Brother.

But…

He could help Bella. The same way he helped me become a little ball of happiness around him, the same reaction I got from myself when I was with nature. But the idea of being in the forest alone was a little less appealing after we watched _Mortal Days_, in which all the killings had been centered in a forest.

Jacob could help Bella, and so, I had no right to keep him to myself. He was his own person, and I knew he had a crush on Bella, too. If he could help Bella, and Bella wanted him to herself, whether she knew it or not, I would back off from my Sun Brother and let her take him. Bella was all that counted.

So I didn't bother trying to stop her when she drove to Jacob's. I gave her the directions, and told her I was going to walk home the rest of the way, that she could go ahead. I wouldn't be able to bear watching her take Jacob from me, even if I wanted her to. It would be too much. Bella didn't protest to me leaving.

A few days later, Bella was going to go out to Jacob's again. Billy would get a ride from Harry Clearwater to go watch the game with Charlie, and Charlie wanted me to hang out with Bella and Jacob today instead of staying. It felt like I was having spikes of ice speared through my heart at the idea of seeing Bella and Jacob having fun together, but I would go for Charlie's sake.

The drive there was silent, and I felt as though Bella felt I was intruding a little bit. I could feel it in the glances she gave me. Like Jacob was already hers. And, I guess, he was. This revelation sent spikes through my heart more.

When we parked outside the Black's home, I spoke up.

"After Billy leaves, I can go down to the beach. I don't have to stay with you guys, if you don't want me to, Bella. We just have to keep it from Charlie, and you tell me what to say if he asks." I told her quietly, tightening my jacket around me.

She glanced at me, and the relief in her eyes made the spikes leave my heart. She was happy with my decision, which was what I wanted. I would be fine.

"Thanks, Evangeline." She never did get to calling me Evan. I didn't mind.

We went up to the door, and Jacob opened it. "Charlie called – said you were on your way."

"Hi, Jacob." Bella said, and I could already tell she was getting better in his mere presence.

It made me smile, and the holes from the spikes closed. This was a good decision, despite whatever I felt.

"Hey." I said quietly, but with Bella here, Jacob only spared me a grin. I didn't mind.

He held up a hand to Bella for a high five, and even though she was five inches taller than me, (I'm 4'9", she's 5'4") she still had to nearly jump to reach his hand, making Jacob laugh. The deep husky laugh of my Sun Brother filled me with warmth I had thought I would never feel again. I was still getting warmth from him, even though he was Bella's now. That made me both angry with myself and happy.

We all went inside, and I went into the kitchen with Billy to wait out Harry's arrival, while Bella and Jacob went to his room.

Billy smiled at me. "Hello, Evan. Here to keep an old man company?"

I smiled tenderly at him, brushing a strand of hair that had fallen out of the bun-and-beanie combination out of my face. "You're not old, Billy, but yes. How are you doing?"

"Great." He said. "It'll be different without you there to help us cheer on the team."

I nodded. "Yeah, it already feels different for me. I hope you guys have fun, though."

He smiled, but looked at me seriously. "And Bella? Is she getting better?"

I nodded happily, a larger smile blooming on my face. "Yeah, she is! Jacob will help her, I know it."

He was about to say something else, but there was a honk outside. Harry was here. I gave Billy a hug as he left, ignoring the side conversation Bella was having with Jacob.

"They're gone, Bella, I'm going!" I said suddenly, as the truck disappeared from my vision.

Jacob looked at me strangely. "Huh? But, Evan, I thought we were all going to hang out."

I shrugged, about to say something, but Bella cut me off. "She knows how important the bikes are to us, and didn't want to intrude. She'll be at the beach most of the day, and she'll come back around five."

"Yeah." I agreed in a subdued tone, suddenly feeling sick. I was really going to give up Jacob, and even though Bella needed him so much, it felt like I was being ripped into pieces. "I'll see you two later. Don't have _too_ much fun." I gave a cheeky wink to Jacob, causing them both to blush.

I smiled. It had been a while since Bella had actually blushed. This was good, I reminded myself, as the sick feeling went away. If Bella is blushing after only a few days, then Jacob really is helping her. Giving him up is a good idea.

I left quickly, after hearing Jacob agree with Bella, and started walking to the beach. Before I could start thinking about how I missed the warmth from my Sun Brother, I pulled my headphones over my ears and started blasting _So What_ by Pink. It was a good song, and made me want to scream defiantly. Be my own person as much as I wanted to.

I started dancing my way to the beach instead of walking.

"So, so what? I'm still a rock star! I got my rock moves! And I don't ne—ed you!" I drug out the word 'need' just as Pink did. "And guess what? I'm havin' more fun, now that we're done! I'm ganna sho-w you tonight! I'm alright! I'm just fine! And you're a fool, so, so what?"

It was fun, and I found myself laughing instead of singing now. I was at the beach, and the song ended. I turned off the I-Pod, when I saw a familiar face, though.

"Hey! Embry!" I shouted, cupping my hands over my mouth to make myself louder.

He looked up, and I realized he looked taller, and more muscular. His hair was cut, too, so it was messy. He was with three other guys, one of which I recognized to be Sam Uley. So he was hanging out with them, now? Cool, I guess.

"Evan! What're you doing here?" Embry asked as I neared. The other three were eyeing me, slight frowns on their faces.

"Jakey-boy is hanging out with Bella, so I'm not intruding. I walked here." I told him happily, now that I was in front of him. "Dude, you've grown, what, a foot? And I saw you last week. Are you on steroids?" I was joking around, and he knew that. The other guys were relaxed now.

Embry laughed, looking a little nervous. "Nah, just this mega growth spurt. C'mon, let me introduce you. Guys, this is Evangeline Higginbotham. Evan, this is Paul Lahote." The taller one, though shorter than Sam, nodded at me. "That's Jared Cameron." The boy grinned at me. "And that's-"

"I've met Evangeline before." Sam cut in. "It's nice to meet you again. I'm Sam Uley."

"I think your better as Shirtless-Guy, since that's what I nicknamed you in my head." I smirked at him. "Seems you didn't catch your death."

"And you're still as tall as a nine year old." He shot bath scathingly.

"Uh…" Embry said, looking dumbfounded for a moment, before recovering. "Well, that's that then. If you're by yourself, Evan, maybe you'd like to hang out with us?" He glanced at Sam. "If that's okay, that is."

Sam shrugged, so I smiled. "Yeah, sure. I could use something to do instead of falling asleep in the sand."

We ended up running through the freezing surf, as I yelled at them good naturally when they didn't get cold. My feet looked a little blue, so I got out and put my socks and hiking boots back on. After that, we went around, picking up random seashells we found. I got a cool sand dollar and a conch shell. Then, when I got tired, Embry gave me a ride on his back, and I nearly fell asleep. He was like a personal electric blanket.

Okay. I did fall asleep.

I woke up a little bit after four, in Embry's lap. The guys were sitting with us, and Embry was listening to my I-Pod. I yawned, and nearly choked when I saw the time on the little device's screen. Four forty-six.

"Shi-crap." I cut off myself from cursing. "I've got to run, guys, thanks for letting me hang out with you." I took the headphones from Embry, and slid them around my neck. The volume was loud enough that I didn't need to put them on to hear.

"Its fine, your pretty fun." Jared said. "Come see us again, alright?"

"Yeah, you're awesome!" Paul interjected.

"For a shorty." Sam snorted.

I huffed, but said anyways. "Yeah, that'd be cool. I'll see you guys."

"Tell Jake I said hi?" Embry asked, near shyly.

I nodded. "Can do."

And with that, I was running home. The I-Pod ran out of songs to play, and the battery died, leaving me with only my thoughts. Which was a bad thing, since it got me started on thinking about Jacob? I felt sick again, and wanted to throw up. I could feel the lunch I'd had rising in my throat, and dropped to my knees on the side of the road. The sound of vomit hitting the ground was louder than I'd anticipated, but that could've been for the lack of any other sound.

No longer did I have anything of my own, not even Embry. He had his friends, I was just a third wheel, and he had overlooked me many times today. I had not noticed it till now, and I crawled away from the vomit, tears spilling down my eyes. Suddenly, instead of just having spikes in my heart, it felt like I didn't have a heart at all.

_It's all for Bella_, I reminded myself._ As long as you can help Bella get better until Edward gets back, it doesn't matter how much it hurts. As long as Bella gets better._

This stopped the tears, and I stood up shakily. I wasn't far from the Black residence, so I didn't have to run anymore. A howl ran through the air loudly, and I shivered, remembering Charlie talking about some abnormally large wolves being spotted in the area a lot. It seemed hours before I got back to Jacob's, but in reality, it was only three minutes. He and Bella were in the garage, laughing together.

"I'm back." I said quietly.

Jacob looked up from his work on the bikes, and I noticed Bella frown a little. Okay, bad idea. She needed Jacob's full attention.

"Hey, Evan, did you have fun?" He asked a large smile on his face and a twinkle in his eyes.

It's not only good for Bella, I realized. Jacob seems happier, too. So that makes this even more worth it in the end.

"Yeah." I said in a clipped tone that he didn't notice. "I ran into Embry. He says hi."

I noticed the twitch in his form when I said this. "Oh, that's cool. Can you call us when everyone gets home?"

I nodded, knowing a dismissal when I heard one. Apparantly, Embry was a sore subject, so I wouldn't bring it up again.

That night, after eating dinner with the Black and Clearwaters, we all went home. I didn't sleep though, at first, and ended up having to listen to music to get myself to. I had nightmares, though. The next morning, I was tired, but that didn't matter. Everything was for Bella, so nightmares could be ignored, since they were nothing compared to hers.

/

A week later, while I was watching TV with Charlie, Bella ran downstairs, looking excited.

"Headed to see Jake?" Charlie asked, but it wasn't really a question.

"Yeah." Was what Bella replied with.

"I'll be at the station later. Take your sister with you." I froze. No, no, no! This was Bella's healing time! I can't butt in!

"Its okay, Charlie, really!" I tried to persuade him, but his decision was already made.

It was awkward, to say the least. Bella explained to Jacob when we got there, slightly peeved, that Charlie wanted me to hang out with them today. He seemed miffed with the decision, and sent small glares at me every now and then in the car. It felt like someone had shoved a red hot poker down my throat, and then icy water. I kept silent the whole time.

This seemed to make it easier to forget I was there, and they went back to themselves at one point. They stopped at one point, to stare at some cliff divers, to whom I recognized as Sam, Paul, Jared and Embry. Bella wanted to cliff dive, nearly getting out of the car to do so. I would have let her, it would help her in the thrill seeking, but Jacob reasoned that it was too cold out at the moment, and I mentally agreed. She would get hypothermia. Those guys were abnormally hot, so it wouldn't bother them, if that day on the beach was any indication.

We finally got to the area where Bella and Jacob were going to ride their bikes. I would have sat in the car, but Bella shot me a look. If Charlie wanted me here, even though it hindered Bella's healing, she wanted me to at least actually do something. I didn't argue.

After they talked some about Sam and his 'gang', and I realized Bella didn't like them, I knew something. I had a decision to make, and there were two choices. One; not tell Bella or Jacob I was friends with them, keep being friends with them, and risk hurting Bella. Two; break off the friendship, never see them again (which also means not going to the beach where I could risk seeing them) and help Bella heal.

I didn't know what to choose. I wanted so badly to keep being friends with them; they had made me feel like I wasn't unnoticed or overlooked. They were my _friends_ and I'd never had any real ones before them and Jacob because I was so overlooked. But if it helped Bella, what could I do? There was no real choice in the matter, actually, but I didn't want to think about it. I would decide later.

"I know Sam." I said suddenly. Why was I saying this anyway? I shouldn't, but I couldn't stop myself, especially with how they stared at me now. "We met a few times, and I hung out with him and the guys on the beach that one time. They didn't seem…bad…"

Jacob looked at me as if I'd grown another head, and then in anger. Like betrayal. It made what I had originally thought a hole, to become solid ice.

"You can't hang out with them, Evangeline." When had I become Evangeline? Why wasn't I Evan still? Had…No. He is Bella's, not mine. "They're bad news."

"No more going to the beach." Bella said, and the fact that she was being protective of me made me happy. She really was getting better, which was just what I had been trying to do! "When we get home, you'll call them and tell them you can't talk to them anymore. Understood?"

That hurt. It hurt so much, but then again, it felt so nice. She was actually protective of me, trying to help me from anything bad that might happen. This was good. But it was bad. I guess I had no real choice in the matter; I had to do this to help Bella. I would give up my best friends for her sake. As long as she got better.

"Okay, I understand."

That didn't mean it didn't hurt.

They got the bikes out, and Bella got on the back. She motioned for me to climb onto the back of it with her, and I did so happily. I wasn't much the third wheel anymore, but the one they wanted to protect.

Then, Jacob started drilling the lessons into Bella. "Okay, where's your clutch?"

The questions started, Bella complained a little, and this was all more proof to me. Jacob was good for Bella, I didn't really need him. My icy insides and tears were nothing compared to what Bella was going through, and that was all that mattered.

Why was I repeating this? I felt like I was, but it didn't matter. My – no, Bella's personal Sun was kick starting the motorcycle for us, and my grip around Bella's waist tightened just a little. The bike thrust forward, and we nearly fell had it not been for Jacob.

"Steady there." He encouraged. "Do you still have the clutch?"

"Yes." Bella said, nearly gasping.

I was shaking slightly. I was all for thrill rides, but motorcycles just weren't my thing. I felt like I was going to die, especially when I looked at the damp sandy ground. I buried my face into Bella's back until she told me to stop, to which I looked up and decided to shoulder it through. My comfort zone was of no consequence right now. Just Bella. Just Bella.

"Plant your feet – I'm going to try again." He put his hand on my back, ready to hold onto us, just in case.

I zoned out of the conversation, settling to give myself a mental pep talk. This was freaking scary, and I didn't want to ride. But I couldn't back out now, for Bella at least.

"Oh!" Bella suddenly gasped, letting go of the brake handle entirely, and the bike bucked forward.

And then we fell sideways, the bike half on top of us. Bella wasn't really listening to us, but she seemed delighted which was enough reason for me to force back the tears of fear. She was happy. Didn't matter that we crashed, she was _happy_.

"Bella?" Jacob asked.

"I'm okay." She answered.

It took several tries, and nearly as many near-falls that scared the living daylights out of me, but soon, we were zooming across the road. And I was scared, like the one time I'd flown in a plane. We could crash at any time, but Bella seemed happier, so I would be happy with her.

And then she mumbled something about the brakes, and slammed her heel down on the pedal one. The one Jacob told her not to use. She stayed on the bike because of the fact she was holding onto the bike fully. I, though, was thrown off the bike.

And for a second, I felt weightless. I was upside down, flying away from Bella and at the tree line. Right side up, feet and hands out in front of me, unable to breathe. And then I crashed into the trunk of the tree, and it shook with the force I hit it with on my side. Some shattered in my coat pocket, my headphones dug into my neck, drawing a large cut, and I hit the ground so hard, I think I broke something, but knew I hadn't. I wasn't crying. Wasn't screaming. Wasn't in pain.

I was in shock, I realized. That's when it wore off, and I heard Jacob helping Bella, and the pain hit. My neck hurt, my side hurt, something sharp in my pocket dug into my skin, and I realized I was crying. Not making noise, of course, but the tears didn't stop.

I swallowed down any sobs I might have, stopped myself from the tears so that my eyes dried, and pushed myself off the ground shakily. Bella had a gash on her forehead, and I had to see if she was alright. Neither of them had noticed I was gone nor not, probably forgetting my existence. I didn't mind.

Neither of them noticed my injuries, and I didn't really care, too focused on Bella.

"Once we get home, I'll stay and you drive Bella." I told Jacob, helping Bella keep pressure on her forehead. I felt a little woozy, and the blood dripping from my neck stained my shirt, but didn't show through my jacket.

"Got it." Jacob said. He was shirtless, and now that he was, I noticed he had the beginnings of abs. I smiled slightly. Good for him.

Once we were home, Bella cleaned up and left with Jacob. I took this time to take a shower, ignoring the stinging it created on my neck, and bandaged the wound, wrapping it around my neck. I put an icepack on my side, there was a nasty bruise already yellowing along the whole right side, across my ribcage. Then, I put on new jeans, socks, and a sweater with a turtle neck to hide the bandages. I could pass it off as being cold.

When I checked my coat pocket, I found what had broke. My I-Pod was no more than a pile of plastic and broken glass. Now, I was crying, like a dam had broken. For so long, that I-Pod had kept me through the day. It was the result of saving my money for weeks and weeks, nearly two years, and it was still the oldest generation. Fat, salty tears slid down my face, and I furiously rubbed at my eyes, to get them to stop. It felt like a funeral to me, when I dropped the broken I-Pod into the trash bin.

I had a call to make, anyways.

Dialing Embry's number, I prepped myself for what I was about to do. It's for Bella, I repeated in my mind. For Bella, for Bella, for Bella.

"_Hello_?" Embry's voice nearly made me stop what I was doing.

For Bella.

"Hey, Embry, it's me." I said quietly into the phone, not able to hide the hoarse tone of my voice from crying so much today.

"_Evan_? _Is something wrong_? _Do you need me to come over_?" He sounded worried. It only made my eyes fill with tears again. Damn crying, maybe I was on my period.

"No, no." I said hurriedly. "It's just… I can't be… I can't be fri-friends with you anymore, Embry. I really do, please believe me, but I have to think of other things first!" Like Bella, my mind supplied. Bella first, always. She's family. "I'm sorry, I-I really am!"

I was crying now. Sobbing. Again. Why was I such a crybaby? This was for Bella; there was no reason to cry! None at all. No more crying.

"_Evan, did someone put you up to this_?" Embry asked, almost sounding angry.

"No! No one did!" Bella…Think of Bella. Have to help Bella. "I'm s-so-o sorry!" My words were becoming a mess. "Pl-please un-understand, Embry!"

And then I hung up. Sliding down to the floor, taking my finger off the receiver, gripping the phone in my hand. I was crying so I pulled my knees up and buried my face in them.

It was all for Bella. Everything would be worth it in the end. Family first, myself second.

**(*)**

** Dear lord, I think this chapter was harder to write than the first one. I keep wanting to have Evangeline defy Bella, think for herself, and now that I'm actually getting a little used to this, I think I may be putting too much angst into it. I'll give her a happy moment next chapter, maybe she'll… Yeah! That's what it is! Evangeline will be so happy!**

… **0_0 ...**

** Oh dear god, I'm starting to think of her as a person. I'm going crazy. Save me with your REVIEWS!**

** Oh, and a shout out to Twihardat911 and Pyschovampirefreak! They were my only reviewers so far! I really do love review, 'because I have self-esteem issues…or, that's what my family says.**


	3. Heartache

**Just the Sister**

**(*)**

**Chapter Three – Heartache**

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It was February now. Bella and I had gone to the movie called _Crosshairs_ with Mike Newton and Jacob. They both obviously liked Bella and didn't seem to like each other all that much. I was ignored for the most part. Apparently, some others were going to come, but had caught the stomach flu. I didn't buy it, but I didn't say anything either.

Mike got sick during the movie, so we left early. I was glad, too. _Crosshairs_ was worse than _Mortal Days_. I was shaking by the time we got home, and couldn't sleep that night, and the next morning, Bella got sick with the stomach flu. I stayed and helped her with it, as usual.

And then, for ten days straight, Jacob left Bella. No matter what either Bella or I did, Billy was adamant about no visitors. It hurt me, so much. Now Bella couldn't get better. She woke up screaming again every night, and I ended up, after the first two days, staying up all night in her bed, to calm her down if she started having one.

I was angry with Jacob, so angry, but I couldn't be for long. Even if I gave him to Bella, his was still thought of as Sun Brother in my head, and that made up for anything. For one, I had a feeling that he was better than ever, and actually wanted to see Bella. But something kept him away and I couldn't find it in myself to get angry.

So I just did what I could for Bella.

I decided, after a few nights of Bella being okay, that I would get some sleep. She didn't have nightmares, and didn't wake me up, letting me sleep in. She always tried to apologize in the mornings when she woke to me half asleep on the floor next to her bed. This was her way of apologizing, even though she didn't need to.

The next day, I got up early, and checked my neck. The wound was healed, but had left an ugly scar kind of. I wore a sweater, this time not a turtle neck, my jeans, hiking boots, and coat. Putting my hair up in a bun-beanie combo, I decided I would actually take a chance to hike today.

And just like how I remembered it, the forest was lovingly beautiful. The crunch of the grass made me feel whole again, as if my heart hadn't been impaled with what happened with Embry, or Jacob, or the guys. I felt so amazing.

I started whistling _Trail of Angels_ as best as I could. It was like the forest sung along, and the wind wrapped around me in a loving embrace. I felt warm. Like Jacob was still my Sun Brother, like I was sitting with Embry and the guys on the beach, joking around with Quil, smiling at Bella laughing.

I let out a laugh, smiling till my cheeks hurt. Plopping down on the grass, I contented myself with staring up at the sky. There was something about the forest today that made it seem extra special, but that may be because I hadn't been in it since early January.

And then someone tripped over me.

"Yah!" I yelped.

"Huh?" Bella. That was Bella's voice. "Evangeline? What are you doing here?"

"I was hiking." I told her truthfully. "What're you doing out here?"

She hesitated, after getting off me. "Uh, hiking. Like you. Trying to find this meadow I saw last year."

I blinked. "Oh, if that's all, I could help you. I know this place like the back of my hand."

She smiled at me, and the warm feeling in my heart intensified. She was still getting better, even without Jacob here! This was great! I was making all the right decisions, wasn't I?

"That would be great, thanks, sis." Sis. Bella actually called me that, acknowledging me as her little sister. She hadn't done so since before we came to Forks! She was doing great.

We stood and started our search. Bella must've noticed my scar, because she glanced at it a few times, almost confusedly. I understood, I guess, neither her nor Jacob had known I was hurt. So I ignored the glances.

Eventually, we found her clearing. Obviously, it wasn't the season for wildflowers, like she'd described it to me, but it was still breath taking.

I heard a gasp, and snapped my head to look at Bella. She looked broken, on her knees, gasping and staring at the clearing. My eyes widened.

"Bella, are you okay?" I asked, kneeling down beside her.

She nodded at me. "Y-yeah. I'm fine."

And then a man stepped into the clearing, I found he had the same likeness as the Cullens. He was a vampire; pale, olive tinted skin, black hair, and red eyes. Like what a real Vampire's eyes would look like, I guessed.

Bella recognized him. "Laurent!"

If she knew him, maybe he could help her. Maybe he could save her from the abyss that I wasn't able to keep away, despite all I did. I was a failure to Bella, I knew it, and suddenly, all the warmth I'd gathered from hiking disappeared. It was replaced with a cold, icy frost in a black hole that should've held my heart. I felt sick again.

"Bella?" The Laurent guy looked astonished.

Bella smiled at him, standing, and I felt the hole-heart in me constrict. "You remember."

Hadn't she given me that smile only a little while ago, and called me Sis? I guess this was also what I had to give up in order for Bella to get better. Acknowledgement as her family. The same love she had given me before.

The hole-hear seemed to collapse in me, making me feel as though I had no insides, only a hole. And it was being repeatedly stabbed over and over again with ice-cold spikes. I really felt sick now.

"I didn't expect to see you here." He said with a smile, strolling towards us. I was being ignored, like an insignificant bug.

And that's what I felt like. I was a failure, I was a bug. I knew that, this guy knew that. I just hoped he helped Bella.

"Isn't it the other way around? I do live here. I thought you'd gone to Alaska." Alaska? Okay, so they were long distant friends. Still friends, though.

They started talking, and I slowly realized that Laurent wasn't a friend. He was a double-agent with a mission – or, that's what I'd compare him to. Who were these people they talked about? Tanya, Irina, Victoria.

And then he stated he'd kill her, and Victoria wouldn't be happy about it. A mate for a mate. This was what had happened last year, I realized. I'd knew Bella hadn't fallen down flights of stairs and out a window. I'd known she'd been attacked, and Edward had protected her. That had been why I'd thanked him, when he was pretending to sleep.

But the dead Vampire had a mate; that made it all the more complicated.

He crouched to spring, and I jumped in front of Bella, arms out. I was shorter than her, and it seemed to amuse him.

"Think you can protect her, little baby?" He mocked. He was beautiful, even his voice, but that didn't deter me.

Hell tempted you with things you wanted and needed after all. I wasn't Christian, but that didn't mean I didn't use it as examples.

"N-no." I whispered. "But I ca-can buy her time."

I was scared. More scared than I had ever been before, more than the motorcycle ride. But I wasn't going to let him at Bella. Bella had to get better, had to be happy when Edward found his way back, even if it cost me my life. I would sacrifice everything for family, and Bella was family.

This amused him even more. "Do you even know what I am?" I didn't have a chance to answer, as his attention was drawn elsewhere. "I don't believe it."

Both Bella and I turned. Holy sh- There were five giant wolves. And they were all after Laurent. When the vampire ran, the wolves went after him, and tore him to pieces. I wanted to look away, but I couldn't. I was shaking. I suddenly had a feeling of déjà vu. And I realized something.

Sam; like an Alpha. Jared and Paul; First and Second. Embry and Jacob; members. These… This was the La Push gang, and they were some kind of werewolf. That was why Jacob hadn't been able to see Bella. They had been fighting vampires. And that inadvertently protected Bella, and so I was thankful to them. I was crying, I realized, silent tears falling from my eyes.

Bella ran from the clearing, and I went after her, helping her up when she fell. We got back in three hours. Charlie was waiting for us, or, Bella, so I was able to slip upstairs to my room unnoticed.

My heart ached. Or, my hole-heart. I had given up my friends for no reason.

NO! Not for no reason. For Bella, who was worried about me. Everything I did, it was always for her, and I wouldn't stop now.

/

Several days later, Bella picked me up from school as Charlie had been asking her to do. He was worrying over her, and subconsciously, me, which warmed the edges of the frost. I fell asleep after five minutes, head leaning against the car window.

I woke up when after a while, and realized Quil was getting in the car. I scooted over to the middle seat with a yawn.

"Hi Quil…" I mumbled, slightly happy at seeing him after so long. He was really nice, and I should have taken advantage of the fact he wasn't a werewolf, since Bella had forbidden me from seeing them. Not that she knew they were werewolves, since I didn't feel like blabbing. I hadn't with Edward's secret when I figured it out.

"Hey, Evie-girl." He said softly, trying to look normal; instead, it only made him look more worried. "Go back to sleep, alright?"

I nodded, and leaned my head against his shoulder. I had been staying up to help Bella sleep again, and my teachers were getting annoyed with me, as I was half asleep in class all the time. But I kept my straight A's.

The next time I woke up, it was at Billy's, I was once again in the window seat, my head against the window, Quil wasn't there, and Bella was doodling.

"When'd we get here?" I said after blinking for a few minutes.

"Just now." Bella said. "We're rescuing Jacob from that Uley guy."

I wanted to groan, but this was what Bella wanted…Even if it was dumb… She was acting more like herself than ever, so this was a good thing, I reasoned. She'd talk to Jacob and get a little better. Maybe they'd be friends again, even.

There was a tap against the door. Jacob was standing outside, a scowl on his face. He had changed physically, I realized. Must be a werewolf thing. He taller a little, more muscled, and an icy expression on his face. The sun had become a moon. My hole-hear, frozen, had cracked and shattered at the expression on his face. I would never have anything. But Bella could get him back to his old self, and she could have him. That was all that mattered.

"Jacob." Bella said.

The whole pack was out there, in a line, all with similar expressions on their faces. If I had thought my hole-heart had been shattered, now it was nonexistent. No heart, no hole-heart. Just nothing. I looked down at my lap, feeling sick to my stomach. I was going to throw up. I was going to throw up.

"What do you want?" Jacob asked gruffly, sparing me a glance. There was something in his eyes, before he looked back at Bella. I didn't try to decipher it.

"I want to talk to you." Bella's voice was weak.

"Go ahead." He hissed.

"Alone." Bella hissed back.

At their tones, I flinched. Bella wouldn't get better like this. Bella would go back to dying inside and I would never have a sister to hold up. I wouldn't be able to help her, and after all I sacrificed, I would be nothing.

I sent a pleading look at Jacob, and that, along with a nod from Sam, he agreed. The others went into the house, and as Bella and Jacob walked into the forest, the sick feeling in my stomach intensified. All food I'd eaten in the last two days, I could feel it coming.

I flipped the seat belt off so quick it slapped me in the face, but I didn't make a sound. I slammed the door open of the truck, and dropped out, onto my hands and knees, and vomited. Loudly, and longley. It seeped over my fingers, piling onto the grass. The scent only made me vomit more, but less puke came and more stomach acid. Then drops of blood stained it. I had nothing left to vomit but blood. And I was crying.

Someone was calling my name, as I sobbed, unable to vomit anymore. I didn't protest to be picked up by someone, carried inside, and set on the bathroom toilet, the seat down. Someone was cleaning me up, Billy, I recognized.

I was still sobbing, as he had someone carry me into the living room. He was warm, I realized. Familiar. I couldn't open my eyes or make a sound though, not to see who it was. Only when Charlie called, and I heard Billy telling him Bella and I were on our way home, did I open my eyes to see whose lap I had my head on, and was soaking with tears. Embry. He looked down at me, worry shining in his eyes.

I felt lifeless, as I sat up. "E-Embry…" My voice was hoarse, like nails on a chalk board. It cracked in the beginning of his name.

"Hey." He whispered. "You okay? You'll need to eat later."

"Fine…" I whispered, too, though not intentionally. I couldn't raise my voice louder without it hurting. "Tell Billy thanks?"

He nodded, and swallowed. "Evan…I wish…we can still be… I mean…"

I shook my head. "No… I have…have to focus on Bella…" I paused. "I'm sorry…"

He nodded, his head bowed. "Okay, I get it. Your sisters convinced we're a bad crowd, and she won't let you talk to me, will she?" I didn't answer. The answer was already clear. "Damn it…"

"She's hurting." I whispered. "I have to put my sister first. Above _everything_. Good bye."

I stood on shaky legs, and walked outside. Bella was standing in the rain. Billy was just going inside, and she didn't notice me as I walked passed her, taking her hand and leading her to the car. I helped her into the passenger seat, not letting her step in my vomit, and got into the drivers' seat. I would drive today, as I had before if something like this happened.

The drive home was silent. Bella looked exactly like she had on _that_ night, and I knew she was going to have nightmares. I would stay with her tonight.

She didn't notice me then, either, as I sat on her bed, stroking her hair in a comforting way. I wish she was the one comforting me, though. But that wasn't possible. I had to help Bella now, anyways. Jacob was gone, and he wasn't coming back. I had to try and be her personal sun instead, even though I felt more like the icy moon instead.

Something scraped against the window, and Bella sat up like a rocket. She seemed horrified, as though she were holding down a scream. And I realized she must think it was that Victoria woman who wanted to kill her. With a wave of bravery, I got off the bed, and grabbed the baseball bat off the floor where I kept it.

"Bella!" A husky voice hissed, and I realized it wasn't Victoria, whoever it was, but Jacob. "Ouch! Damn it, open the window! OUCH!"

She rushed to the window, and opened it. "What are you _doing_?"

"Trying to keep-" I hear Jacob huff. "my promise!"

"When did you ever promise to kill yourself falling out of Charlie's tree?"

Jacob wasn't amused. "Get out of the way."

I knew this was Bella's talk to have, and quietly left the room. When he left, I came back in, unnoticed, as Bella went to sleep. I sat on the edge of her bed, waiting to see if I was needed. I was. She started having a nightmare soon enough, and I was able to calm her down while she kept on sleeping. I felt dead tired, having not slept in days, but it was my duty as her sister to not fall asleep. I would keep her nightmares away.

When she woke up, she gasped out one word. "Werewolf."

"Figured it out?" I asked, squashing any drowsiness from me.

She looked at me. "You knew?"

I nodded. "I figured it out that day in the meadow." Her eyes widened, as she remembered I was there. "It wasn't my secret to tell."

"So-so you know about the-the-" She couldn't say Cullens.

"Yeah." I answered. "Vampires. You seem to attract a lot of story book characters, Bells."

She stopped talking, thinking. Then, she was racing to get dressed, and I didn't bother. I hadn't changed into pajamas, either, so I still had on my clothes. Bella talked to Charlie a little, and then we were headed to the Blacks'. She went inside for a couple of minutes, before coming out and saying we were going to the beach. I followed, silent as a rock.

Soon enough, Jacob turned up.

"Jake?" She was worried, I knew, about what the hunters were going to do. I was, too, but didn't think that the humans would be able to kill a werewolf; more than likely, they'd get killed by the vampire that the wolves were trying to kill.

"Billy told me you came by – didn't take you very long, did it? I knew you could figure it out." Once again. I am a shadow, not a person.

The defiant thought made me blanch. No. No going against it. I wasn't here to be bold and colorful; I was here to support Bella. To help Bella. Always Bella.

"Yeah, I remember the stories now." She glanced at me. "Evangeline already figured it out, apparently."

Jacob glanced at me. "Really?"

I nodded.

"And you didn't tell?"

"Not my secret to tell." I repeated the words I'd spoken this morning to Bella. "I knew about the Cullens, too, if that helps any. Werewolves weren't exactly a big jump."

He nodded, and turned back to Bella. "You could have just called." Harsh. Acidic. That was what his tone was.

"I know." Bella replied.

He started pacing along the rocky shore. Pebbles crunched under my feet, and I tightened my jacket around me from the cold. After more arguing, they were finally friends again, and I was just happy to know that Bella had her Sun back. Maybe I could even have Embry as a friend again.

A little while later, I sat in the car, watching what happened with the pack. I wasn't worried, I realized, when Paul and Jacob ran into the forest as wolves to fight it out. I had always followed my intuition before. This was all fine and dandy, then.

Then, Embry opened the door, as he was putting Bella inside, and saw me. His eyes went wide, and shocked, and – what the? – a little fearful. Worried, too.

He made a bet with Jared, who smiled at me, though also a little shocked. I didn't talk the way to Emily's. He was, apparently, Sam's fiancé. When we got there, she asked if we were hungry, and I saw the scars. I twitched, itching to touch the large ugly scar on the side of my neck. It felt like I was meeting a comrade, as we both had scars. But hers were from a werewolf, obviously, and mine was from a bike crash. I didn't have a right to feel this camaraderie.

She held a plate of blueberry muffins that looked gigantic. I felt my stomach churn in mixed feelings. I was hungry, after vomiting two days were of food, stomach acid and blood, but I also felt I might vomit it back up if I ate. That would be bad manners.

"Oh, who're these two?" Emily looked surprised.

"Bella Swan." Jared said. "Who else?"

"Leave it to Jacob to find a way around." Emily murmured. "So you're the vampire girl."

Bella stiffened. "Yes. And you're the wolf girl?"

I felt like a third wheel. A shadow. But Bella was okay. That was good. I was going to be her shadow and keep her up till Edward got back.

They all – Jared, Embry and Emily, that is – laughed.

"I guess I am." Emily said. Then she turned to me. "You must be little Evangeline, then?"

I nodded slightly. "Yes, ma'am."

"No need to be so formal, call me Emily. Embry talks about you sometimes, he's been worried." I flushed a little. When had it been the last time I'd done so? Years. "Where's Sam?"

"Bella, er, surprised Paul this morning." Jared said, looking sheepish. Embry placed a hesitant hand on my shoulder, and I accidentally leaned into it like I used to, before shaking my head and shrugging it off. Without Bella's consent, I wouldn't be his friend. Not until I saw she was comfortable with the pack.

"Ah, Paul." Emily sighed. "Do you think they'll be long? I just started the eggs."

"Don't worry." Embry cut in. "If they're late, we won't let anything go to waste."

Emily chuckled, and opened the refrigerator door; I only now realized we were in the kitchen. "No doubt. Bella, Evangeline, are you hungry? Go ahead and help yourself to a muffin."

I watched Bella, to see if she took one. This action didn't go unnoticed by Embry and Jared, and they shared a glance. When Bella took one, so did I, and mumbled out a thanks. Nibbling on it, I contented myself to small bites until my stomach settled.

I felt like I was in a story, and Bella was the main character. I was just the supporting roll, and that's where I liked to be. I started to tune out of the conversation until we started to eat. I mulled over the conversation in my mind, as I picked at my food. It _was_ March, wasn't it? I hadn't noticed, so preoccupied with helping Bella that I hadn't known when the month changed. What day was it, then? I didn't ask.

Bella went with Jacob after breakfast. I sat in the living room silently with the guys. Emily was doing something in the kitchen. We were all silent.

"So you knew about everything?" Sam finally broke the silence. I nodded. "Then why not do anything?"

"Not my secret to tell." I mumbled. "Bella had so much to deal with; I didn't want myself to be on it, too."

Silence. Then Jared.

"Why did you stop being our friend?" He asked.

"I didn't want to worry Bella." I told them, only half lying. "She still thought you were a gang, and as much as I wanted to hang out with you guys, I couldn't. I'm so sorry, please understand! I mean, we can be friends again, now!"

"Yeah, okay." Embry said, as Jared turned on the TV and game system. "Ready for some _Call of Duty_?"

My stomach lurched at the thought; I'd been watching scary, gory movies with Bella nearly every night for her sake, and this was not what I needed. But I wasn't telling them that.

"Sure!" I said, forcing myself to sound excited. I wasn't giving up my friends again, only if Bella said to.

In the end, Bella and I spent the day here; her with Jacob or Emily, and me with Embry, Paul, Jared and Sam playing video games. We went home, talked to Billy, and I prepared myself for another sleepless night. The excitement-high I got from staying up all night was fading, leaving me ready to pass out. I couldn't, though, for Bella. As always.

"We're going cliff diving with Jacob tomorrow." Bella mumbled. "So get some sleep, please?"

I smiled widely. With Jacob back, Bella was herself again! Her Sun was warming the ice, fixing her. Not wanting to break such a mood from my sister, I obeyed, and closed my eyes. I was asleep not a minute later, and could only feel Bella's hands raking through my hair softly. This was how she was supposed to be.

I had done everything right. All of it was for this. At least, till Edward got back.

/

I woke up later than usual the next day to Bella shaking my shoulder. She was already dressed and ready, so I got up quickly and showered. I dressed in a sweater, jeans, my boots, my jacket and the bun-beanie combo. I missed my I-Pod, and the feeling of my headphones around my neck. I was already saving money to buy another one. I brought a bag of spare clothes with us, too, for after we dived, just in case. She always seemed to forget to think ahead.

The drive to the Black residence was silent. Not in an uncomfortable way, but a nice way. She acknowledged my presence in the room, and that made me happy. When we got there, though, Billy was waiting for us instead of Jacob.

He told us that there was something going on with Victoria. Bella started to get worried about them all, but Billy assured us that they would be fine. My intuition said that they would be, but Bella wasn't as convinced. She said she was going to the beach to wait, and I followed, knowing something. She had, once again, forgotten I was there.

The realization of the statement hit my like a boulder being dropped on my head. The ice in my hole-heart flared out again, anything that had melted yesterday returning better than before. I felt sick to my stomach, and watched as Bella worried herself, feeling the need to vomit. I had been doing that a lot lately, I realized, and should stop. But could I help it if I felt sick?

Bella, though; think of Bella. No getting sick today, you're with Bella.

"We're going cliff diving." Bella said suddenly, braking me from my thoughts; she had noticed me just enough for this statement.

A moment later, as we hurried up the cliff paths. Bella, it seemed, wanted to jump from the top one. The one that Jacob had said we couldn't do yet. I didn't argue with Bella's decision; if this was the thrill she wanted, this was what I would let her have.

When we got to the top, she didn't take off anything. I was glad I left my coat at Billy's then, so that it didn't get wet. I grabbed her hand in a vice like grip. I wasn't scared of heights, no, but knowing that we were so high up and that we were going to jump from this had me scared.

I looked out of the corner of my eye at the taller girl next to me. Bella almost looked like she was talking with someone. But, I also noticed she looked so happy, like a kid given a whole candy store. I smiled. This was good. My fear of jumping from here was dumb and useless as long as Bella was happy and herself. And she was that right now.

Suddenly, Bella put her hands out, as if she were going to dive, which consequently drug my hands out with her. Then, she jumped and I pushed off to keep up with her.

Weightlessness was not a feeling I enjoyed. I swallowed down a scream, and quickly checked which way was shore. Swim parallel to it, and we'd get there quicker. Bella wouldn't remember to check which way, so I would.

Hitting the water was like hitting concrete. And damn, did concrete hurt.

**(*)**

** Holy crap, this was a hard chapter to write. I had to go back and take out this big confrontation that I'd written in yesterday with the Pack and Bella, making her realize what was going on with her sister. But that can't happen yet, no one gets to know her problems yet! Hahira! I feel like an evil overlord torturing a child. And while that makes me feel sick, it also makes me a little giggly. I don't giggle. I might be going crazy.**

** REVIEWS SAVE MY SANITY!**


	4. Italy

**Just the Sister**

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**Chapter Four – Italy**

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The water was freezing, and I nearly started going in circles underwater because the current and riptide were practically fighting over Bella. But we needed to stay alive. I kept repeating in my head; help Bella, help Bella, help Bella. I was losing air, but Bella was drowning quicker than I was.

I pushed towards the surface, kicking as fast as I could. Bella was like frozen in the water, unable to move. She had a smile on her face, and for the first time, instead of happiness, I felt dread. What if she didn't mind dying? What if she thought that was a way to escape the pain – the _only_ way?

If only Jacob were here, I thought desperately. He could have saved Bella. I furiously tugged at Bella's wrist, my beanie gone, hair somehow undone, so that my hair swirled in my face. It nearly blinded me, but I wasn't having any of it.

And suddenly, it was like a moving flame in water was near us. Bella's eyes weren't as good as mine, so that's probably what she saw. But I? I saw a beautiful woman, a Vampire, with crazy fiery orange curls and black eyes. Hungry eyes. My mouth opened, and I let out a scream of terror, and the bubbles floated from my mouth. No air. Not good, why'd I scream.

Even more urgently, I pulled at Bella vainly. It was no use. We… We were going to drown.

And then, I felt a warm iron bar grabbing me around the stomach, the vampire disappeared, and a familiar arm grabbing Bella, too. I looked, and saw Jacob, who was staring at Bella. Thank god. Thank god.

Once he got us to the surface, I sucked in a breath, spitting out sea water. When we finally reached the beach, I was crying, and crawled a little ways away from Bella and Jacob. Sam was here, but I couldn't think about that. I felt too sick to think. My stomach bubbled, and suddenly, I was vomiting again. Vomiting and coughing; and it wasn't just food anymore, but sea water and stomach acid too.

I was only half awake the way back to Billy's. Half-awake to change into new clothes – Bella ignored the ones I set out for her, opting to use Jacob's clothes – and settle my head on Jacob's shoulder. Bella gets the couch.

I fell asleep easily, and drifted sometimes when I was being lifted into the truck, sat between Jacob and Bella. Sleep was so much easier. There was no hole-heart here, no ice to stab it with, no sick feeling in my gut. I could sleep forever, I thought. Like Sleeping Beauty, but with no Prince to wake me. I wouldn't mind that.

"OH!" Jacob's yell was loud and woke me up, making me sit stock straight and alert. "Holy _crap_!"

He slammed the door shut, and I looked around, hearing him turn on the ignition. Bella and Jacob were talking, but I was too busy looking around after hearing 'Vampire'. There was a shiny, expensive black car parked across the street from Charlie's house. When'd we get here, anyways? Never mind.

"Stop!" Bella gasped out. "Stop!"

"What?!" I was inclined to agree with Jacob right now. If it was Victoria, Bella could get killed.

"It's not Victoria!" That's a relief. But the only other Vampires we know are-YES! I knew they'd be back, and now Bella would get better and be happy again! "Stop, stop! I want to go back."

Jacob stomped on the brake so hard; my forehead smacked the dashboard loudly. Ouch. That was going to leave a bruise.

"What?" He sounded horrified. Why? It was the Cullens!

"It's Carlisle's car! It's the Cullens. I know it!" I nodded my head quickly in agreement. A violent tremor racked Jacob, and Bella quickly said. "Hey, calm down, Jake. It's okay. No danger, see? Relax."

Yes. Relax, Jacob, you're her Sun right now, you can't tear this! Not after all the decisions I made, not after all I gave up! I felt myself get a little sick again at the thought of everything having been a waste, and Bella going back to being _that_.

We went back, Jacob waited outside, and Bella rushed upstairs to her room, with me following behind. Alice Cullen was there, and I felt my shoulders sag in relief when Bella hugged her. Everything was going to be okay again!

Alice seemed so focused on Bella; she hardly knew I was here. That was okay.

"You look like hell, Bella." Alice said, frowning. I frowned, too. She looked better than before, didn't she? That counted. Besides, when Edward got back to her, she would be great! Better than great!

"I drowned today." Bella reminded her.

"It goes deeper than that. You're a mess."

Bella flinched, and I wanted to glare at Alice, but knew that wouldn't do anything. "Look, I'm doing my best."

"What do you mean?"

"It hasn't been easy. I'm working on it." Warmth bloomed. She was good enough now that she was working on it, too! All my decisions were good, then; giving up Jacob let her take the initiative to get better.

"I told him." Alice sighed.

I felt like a spectator now. This wasn't my life anymore, but a movie. And I was the only one in the audience.

"Alice." Bella sighed, too. "What did you think you were going to find? I mean, besides me dead? Did you expect to find me skipping around and whistling show tunes? You know me better than that."

"I do, but I hoped."

"Then I guess I don't have the corner on the idiocy market." Huh? I didn't get it, but whatever.

The phone rang.

"That has to be Charlie." Bella said and picked it up.

Alice was listening in one ear, I saw, and looked at me. "You're her little sister, right? Evangeline Higginbotham?"

I nodded. "Call me Evan. You must be Alice." Now, don't I feel like a schmuk? I already know she knows I know this.

"And you know about us? And you won't tell?"

"I kept your secret before, didn't I? None of you even knew I knew." I sighed.

"Well…I guess you're my honorary little sister now!" She suddenly grabbed me in a hug, and then held me at arm's length. "You look more like hell than Bella does."

I shrugged. "Its fine, I don't mind. Bella's the one you should be worried about."

She went stiff for a moment, eyes glazed and I realized she was having a vision. A moment later, she was fine and was looking at me in an expression I didn't recognize. Pity? No, sympathy? Maybe. I couldn't decipher it.

"Edward can't read your mind, either." Alice said. "Must be something about being related to Bella."

Suddenly, Bella was done on the phone. "Oh, you've met Evangeline then? Great."

The rest of the day was a blur. Bella left a note for Charlie saying we'd gone with Alice; we packed, and I was grateful for having the passport we used from Renee's wedding. I slept the whole plane ride, after listening to Alice explain what the Volturi were.

Alice stole a bright yellow Porsche 911 Turbo, and I fell in love with it mentally. Not that I would ever get to keep something like this. We were shoved into the car quickly, and Alice started driving like the world depended on it. The car was so fast, and unlike the motorcycle incident, I didn't feel scared. I felt thrilled, a large smile on my face, eyes closed. Not the time to be smiling, though, so I forced a calm look onto my face.

We wove our way through everywhere, Alice was zipping between cars. We got stopped a few times, before finally, she stopped. She hissed at Bella that she had two minutes and to run. I knew she might trip, and wanted to follow, but Alice shot me a look that clearly meant 'stay here'.

A few moments after Bella left, Alice was able to park.

She had a few moments of visions before saying. "You'll have to come. There's no avoiding it. Climb on my back."

I nodded, and we stepped out into the dark alley way she'd parked in. Instead of letting me climb onto her, Alice simply swung me across her back as though I were an ant. And then she was running.

_Now_ it felt like the motorcycle. So I closed my eyes and kept the whimpers of fear away. Soon enough, she dropped me, but kept a hand in my, so that I could be half hidden behind her. She was only about an inch or so taller than me.

"Let's behave ourselves, shall we?" She asked as we walked forward, revealing the two of us. "There are ladies present."

Edward was protecting Bella from the two vampires. I hadn't seen Bella so happy since during the summer before her birthday. This was amazing. Great. Too great for words! Edward locked eyes with me, and then looked at Alice.

"Why did you bring Evangeline?" He hissed. So he knew me? Bella had mentioned me. That sent warmth through me.

Alice glared, and must have thought something, since Edward looked away.

"We're not alone." Alice reminded them. A family in red cloaks was watching us.

I didn't listen to them. Another vampire showed up, this one as tall as me with short brown hair, called Jane. The others, Felix and Demetri, I learned, were trusting of her. We were led to an open grate, to which I was dropped down after Alice, before Bella. More bruises. Yay. Note the sarcasm.

We walked through the halls, passed a receptionist named Gianna and met a boy-vampire I believe to be Jane's twin, Alec. Then, we entered the throne room where the Volturi kinds sat. Aro came down to talk to Jane.

"And Alice and Bella, too!" He cried. He clapped his hands together like a child, and I felt the urge to cuddle him; I'd always been a weakness to cute things. "This _is_ a happy surprise! Wonderful!" And then he noticed me. "Oh, but who is this? A stray for a meal?" He smiled at me and all cuddling urges were gone as a shiver went down my spine.

I would only ever be a meal if it were beneficial towards Bella's wellbeing.

My mind stopped. I knew something now with that single thought. I realized the extent of the sacrifices I would make for Bella; I would give up my life.

"My name's Evangeline Higginbotham." I whispered, still nearly hiding behind Alice. "I'm Bella's younger half-sister." Always that.

I wasn't mentioned after that, though Aro cast me a lot of curious glances, to which I edged my way behind Alice even more. The other two Volturi kings, Marcus and Caius, entered at one point. And Marcus stared at me most of the time. Then, when Marcus touched Aro's palm, Edward snorted and Aro raised his brows.

"Thank you, Marcus." Aro said, and I realized something; he read minds through skin on skin contact. "That's quite interesting." He was shaking his head now. "Amazing. Absolutely amazing."

Alice looked frustrated, and I was afraid she might do something. Edward turned to her.

"Marcus sees relationships. He's surprised by the intensity of ours." Edward explained, and glanced at my eyes, from where I was peering over Alice's shoulders. "And also by the…lack of relationships Evangeline has. She has only one thin one." With Bella, I realized. After all, I was devoted to helping her.

"So convenient. It takes quite a bit to surprise Marcus, I assure you." Aro said, and I believed him; Marcus look dead. No pun. "It's just so difficult to understand. How can you stand so close to her like that? Or the little one, who smells just as appetizing?"

I started to tune out, but registered what they said in my mind. At one point, Aro wanted to read Bella's mind through her hand. He couldn't.

"And what of your sister, I suppose?" Aro asked Bella. "Edward can't read her mind, either, I wonder if you're the same here too." He glanced at me. "Evangeline?"

I swallowed thickly, and stepped out from Alice, my fingers gripping the insides of the overly large sleeves of my jacket. I quickly walked over to them, I pushed the sleeve back so that my hand was visible and Aro grabbed it softly. He blinked at me with a frown.

"It seems you are both talented humans." He said softly. "I can't read your mind either, little Evangeline."

And then he called for Jane to use her talent on Bella. Edward dove in front of Bella before he could, though, was writhing in pain.

No. No. No. Bella could get better with Edward, but if Edward was in pain, so was Bella. I was panicking mentally, not even aware of the fact that I had moved to cover Edward as though I could protect him. He stopped writhing in pain, and I felt sick to my stomach. The stomach ache had been growing all day, since yesterday when I vomited. I was so hungry. I hadn't had enough food for days, but this wasn't the time to think about it.

"Interesting." Aro whispered. "Evangeline? Why protect him? He has nothing to do with you other than being Bella's love."

"That's more than enough reason." I whispered harshly. It was the first time I'd spoken since I'd introduced myself. Marcus' eyes locked with mine. Understanding? Why?

In the end, Edward promised to have her and I changed by the end of the next year. Conflicting emotions rose in me. I wanted to always be there for Bella, to help her, but if I became a Vampire – and there was no 'if' with the Volturi, I guess – then I most likely will have to give up my friendship with the pack. What was I supposed to do? It was like I was being torn in half with a knife dipped in acid.

We went back to the reception room, and was told not to leave before dark. Bella was going into hysterics, but Edward fixed her. The fact that he was sitting there next to me, Alice on the other side of him, with Bella in his lap…it sent a sense of bursting gratefulness through me. He was finally back and Bella would get better. The feeling of relief that my work was finally done also made me angry with myself. I shouldn't get tired of taking care of my older sister. But the feeling lulled me to sleep.

It didn't matter that I was in a place where I could be drained dry at any moment. Bella had her Edward and that was everything to me.

/

I woke up when we were getting on a plane because I needed to go through the security check stuff. I was still half asleep then, and snoozed on the plane ride, only waking up when we had to get off.

That's where the Cullens met us. Esme – I think that was Esme, I'm still half asleep – went to Bella and Edward, while Jasper went to Alice. I yawned into my elbow. Someone walked over to me, and I recognized him as Carlisle.

"Hello, I don't believe we've met." He said charmingly, like he could make me forget everything. "I'm Carlisle Cullen, that's my wife Esme, and her nephew, Jasper." He didn't know I knew.

"Evangeline Higginbotham, Bella's little sister." I mumbled, stumbling along them on the way to the cars tiredly. "I already know. Volturi want me an' Bella changed my next year. No use trying to charm me into forgetting." I was snappy, I shouldn't be. "Sorry for snapping. 'M tired."

I don't remember what he said, but suddenly I was in the car with him, Esme, Alice and Jasper. Bella and Edward rode with Emmet and Rosalie. I could hear them talking through the haze of drowsiness.

"Her emotions are shot." Jasper, the empathy, was saying. "All she feels is that for Bella. Happiness for Bella. But there are other emotions. Like anger, depression, longing, sadness, self hate, ECT. Why…"

"Is she so messed up?" Alice finished. "I've seen her future. She's going to be so precious to you and me. She's never lived for herself, you see. Only ever for Bella. She's run herself dry with helping Bella get better. She gave up _everything_ for Bella. She would have given up her life back in Volterra if it kept Bella alive."

I heard some other things, but I fell asleep before they could register. Alice had said the truth. I _had _run myself dry, but it didn't matter, as long as Bella was okay. As long as Bella was okay, it didn't matter what I thought or felt. My emotions were nothing.

But how was I going to be precious to Alice and Jasper? I didn't get it.

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** God, I just spent the last three hours righting this. I think it feels rushed to me. Anyways, I want to say something; MORTAL DAYS IS NOT A REAL FILM! I MADE IT UP! I got some questions about it, so I just wanted to let you all know. It was made for the one purpose to replace Bella's night out with Jessica, so that she didn't see the Zombie-Romance thing. **

** This chapter wasn't as hard as the last. I think I'm getting used to her character, but I still have these moments where I want her to kick ass.**

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